Linking you to resources and support in the lung cancer community!

My mom

It is with a heavy heart that I write that my mom, Patricia, passed away on Saturday March 12, 2011. She had just turned 66 years old on March 8.

Mom was a cancer survivor of 8 years. Given 6 months to a year at diagnosis, she continued to defy the odds and beat every recurrence over the years. However, she took a turn for the worst around Christmas time, and these past 3 months or so were very hard on her.

Mom was tired of fighting, and knew it was coming. She asked Dad and I to stay home with her on Friday, and finally agreed to let Hospice get involved. She had a bad night Friday, and we had the emergency Hospice nurse here all day Saturday when she became unresponsive. We took her to Hospice house to see if they could make her more comfortable, but she passed as she got there. Im very grateful Hospice was involved in the end, they were wonderful.

Mom was my hero, and a true inspiration to everyone around her. She touched so many lives with her kindness and gentleness.

It's funny how I can write all this right now. I have good moments and bad.

Thanks to all for the support over these past few months. It has definitely helped. God Bless everyone.

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Permalink Reply by TamaTam on March 15, 2011 at 10:46pm

I am here for you ...........

Tamie

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Permalink Reply by AmyLCA on March 17, 2011 at 10:54am

Oh, Kristen... I'm so sorry about your mom. What an amazing woman. 8 years! I'm glad you guys involved hospice.

You will find that the good moments and bad moments will alternate fast and furious for a while. Hospice can be a great resource for grief support too, so don't be afraid to use them if you need it.

Warm wishes,

Amy

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Permalink Reply by GADawg/MOD on March 17, 2011 at 2:59pm

Kristen,

I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I didn't know she fought LC for 8 years- what a tough lady! Just know that my thoughts are with you and your family right now.

Charla (GADawg)

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Permalink Reply by Kris10 on March 21, 2011 at 7:40pm

Thanks everyone. It's been a struggle. Worrying about mom is all I've known for the past 8+ years. I feel very lost right now. I guess I need a new focus in life, or something. It's been slightly over a week, but nothing like what I thought I was prepared for. The emptiness and sadness is insane.

Tamie- Thanks! I'm here for you too (as you know)

Amy- I think hospice is going to contact Dad and I about bereavement support. Normally I shy away from that kind of thing, but I think this time I could definitely use the support.

Charla- Yep, 8 years, 10 if you count her having breast cancer before that (unrelated). I think that's why it seems so surreal, she fought so long. Such an inspiration.

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Permalink Reply by GADawg/MOD on March 22, 2011 at 4:49pm

Hi Kristen,

I can see what you mean about needing a new focus in life. For over 5 years, taking care of my mom has been my focus and all I've known. Maybe just as living with cancer eventually became your "new normal," you'll be able to find a new focus and a "new normal" in this next phase of your life. I definitely think bereavement support could help you- I'm in therapy now and it does help me feel a bit stronger about handling everything. Hang in there, and please let us here at LLL know how you're doing- :)

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Permalink Reply by AmyLCA on March 23, 2011 at 10:15am

I know about that "focus" thing too. It can be kind of scary to have to find a new focus, but it's good too. A fresh start, in a way.

You can never truly prepare for the loss of a loved one. It doesn't matter how much time you have.